Poor Jokes Thread

snap

Lurker
<Cthon98> hey, if you type in your pw, it will show as stars
<Cthon98> ********* see!
<AzureDiamond> hunter2
<AzureDiamond> doesnt look like stars to me
<Cthon98> <AzureDiamond> *******
<Cthon98> thats what I see
<AzureDiamond> oh, really?
<Cthon98> Absolutely
<AzureDiamond> you can go hunter2 my hunter2-ing hunter2
<AzureDiamond> haha, does that look funny to you?
<Cthon98> lol, yes. See, when YOU type hunter2, it shows to us as *******
<AzureDiamond> thats neat, I didnt know IRC did that
<Cthon98> yep, no matter how many times you type hunter2, it will show to us as *******
<AzureDiamond> awesome!
<AzureDiamond> wait, how do you know my pw?
<Cthon98> er, I just copy pasted YOUR ******'s and it appears to YOU as hunter2 cause its your pw
<AzureDiamond> oh, ok.

*www.bash.org/?top
 

Nanducob

Wise Old Owl
Dis is one of best suspense jokes

A Father put his 3year old daughter to bed, told her a story and listened to her prayers which ended by saying,
"God bless Mommy, God bless Daddy, God bless Grandma and good-bye Grandpa."

The father asked, 'Why did you say good-bye Grandpa?'

The little girl said, "I don't know daddy, it just seemed like the thing to do."

The next day grandpa died.
The father thought it was a strange coincidence.

A few months later the father put the girl to bed and listened to her prayers which went like this,
"God bless Mommy, God Bless Daddy and good-bye Grandma."

The next day the grandmother died.

"Holy crap" thought the father, "this kid is in contact with the other side."

Several weeks later when the girl was going to bed the dad heard her say, "God bless Mommy and good-bye Daddy."

He practically went into shock. He couldn't sleep all night and got up at the crack of dawn to go to his office.

He was nervous as a cat all day, had lunch and watched the clock.. He figured if he could get by until midnight he would be okay.
He felt safe in the office, so instead of going home at the end of the day he stayed there, drinking coffee, looking at his watch and jumping at every sound. Finally midnight arrived; he breathed a sigh of relief and went home.

When he got home his wife said,
"I've never seen you work so late. What's the matter?"

He said, "I don't want to talk about it, I've just spent the worst day of my life."

She said, "You think you had a bad day, you'll never believe what happened to me. This morning my boss died in the middle of a meeting 
 

Zangetsu

I am the master of my Fate.
A guy was walking down a dense forest where he saw 3 men sitting on 3 trees
he noticed them closely, 1st man was shouting vrrmmmmm..vrooooommmmm...pe pe and moving his hand like controlling steering.
so the guy understood he is simulating the tree as a car and himself (the man) as driver.
then he moved on to 2nd man who was doing the same but with moving his body more fiercely and crying out loud....bhrrrrooooomm,bhhhhhroooom....
so, the guys knew he was also doing the same....but when he moved on to the 3rd Man......who was sitting idle and doing nothing just looking up above the skies,
birds and wind flows,leaves etc (such like he was thinking of something)

so, the guy (spectator) thought why only this Man is not doing anything..so out of curiosity he asked the 3rd Man..."hey pal, why u r sitting idle....your other partners are driving (simulating) cars..so y don't u do the same....."
the moment the 3rd Man heard that he said "Ohhhhhhh my god....the Race has been started.....vrooooooooooooovrmmmrmrmmroomoommormmmm...!!!!"
 

.jRay.

Youngling
A new trend of shortening names has begun in politics. Narendra Modi is called "Namo" and Rahul Gandhi is called "RaGa".

Harish Goyal and Mukesh Tomar have decided to quit politics.

Supriya Sule did not respond to our queries
 

dashing.sujay

Moving
Staff member
A new trend of shortening names has begun in politics. Narendra Modi is called "Namo" and Rahul Gandhi is called "RaGa".

Harish Goyal and Mukesh Tomar have decided to quit politics.

Supriya Sule did not respond to our queries

I was getting this msg from many persons since day before.
 

nomad47

Cyborg Agent
A man whose wife went into labor calls 108
Man: Send the ambulance. My wife has gone into labor.
Operator: Is this her first born?
Man: No, this is her husband
 

RCuber

The Mighty Unkel!!!
Staff member
A professor travels to Africa to live with a primitive tribe and spends years with them, teaching them all about the wonders of science, mathematics, and formatting Reddit comments so they get the most upvotes. One day, the Chief's wife gives birth to... a white child!

The word spreads, and the entire tribe is in shock. The chief pulls the professor aside and says, "Look, you're the only white man we've ever seen around here, and this woman just gave birth to a white child. It doesn't take a genius to figure out what happened!"

The professor replied, "No, Chief. You're mistaken. What you have here is a natural occurrence, what we in the civilized world call an albino! Look at that field over there. All of the sheep are white except for one black one. Nature does this on occasion."

The chief was silent for a moment, then said,
"Tell you what. You don't say anything more about that sheep and I won't say anything more about that white child."

From Reddit
 
Top Bottom