In the wake of the tragic death of the gang rape victim, I have been asking a lot of questions to myself. I am a brother, a friend, a son, and in the future, I will be a husband and a father. Unfortunately, I am increasingly getting unsure of safety of women in India.
For centuries, we have been taught to respect our culture and heritage. For a country where a majority of the population worships a female deity, we kill more than half a million girls even before they are born. The one who survives, are subjected to life long struggle of survival. A recent survey conducted by The Times of India shows that over 70% of all women faced sexual harassment at some point.
It’s humbling to see the call for change, as millions of us joined hands to force the government to change the laws. I fully agree and support this revolution. However, I do not believe that this alone can make our country safer for women. Poor law enforcement is a part of the problem. Lack of social awareness and education is more widespread and unfortunately more difficult to eradicate.
Sure, we can start hanging rapists.
What about those thousands of incidents that are happening every day in Delhi that do not “qualify” to be called rapes? My question goes out to thousands of women, who step out of the house every morning. Most of my female friends have revealed that they have faced such situation many times. It was saddening how each one of them told me how someone misbehaved with them on the roads, in busses, in cinema halls etc. When they started narrating how bystanders and onlookers reacted, I was devastated. “I was crying and asking for help, and they were just smiling” she said. In less than a minute, the culprit was gone. Eye witnesses, who were feasting on this sadistic opportunity and smiling, were good for nothing. With no proof of what happened, she was left violated. Surrounded by laughing crowd, she accepted this as her fate.
It’s not just their experience. I have seen enough myself. Whenever a woman walks by, a dozen pair of eyes starts scanning every inch of her. Eighteen year old college students to sixty year old grandfathers, all joining hands to make sure all barriers of indecency are broken.
Next part of the problem is widespread backward thinking.
After every case of misbehavior with women surfaces, most of the people, men and women, blame the lifestyle of the victim. Some villages have banned jeans and any other western outfits for women. According to these people, temptation is the cause of these crimes. During an television reality show, MTV Roadies 9, a girl from Haryana, Pratima Dagar revealed this mindset. She clearly said, if a girl is raped, it’s her fault. Not the men who raped her. This is the state of an educated girl who has represented the state in sporting activities. I don’t know what creates such ignorant thinking. This ideology literally translates to the following statements:
If a criminal robs a wealthy person, then the wealth of the person is the cause. It tempted the criminal. Solution: No one should have money
If a criminal steals a car, then the car owner is the cause. It tempted the criminal. Solution: We should not buy cars
If freedom of a lifestyle is taken away, then possession of wealth should also be made illegal.
In India, girls as young as four and as old as seventy are raped. Government is only a small part of the problem. We keep exhibiting our rich Indian heritage to the world. Right now, I am ashamed when people from different countries including Pakistan ask me why there are so many rapes and molestation cases in India.
How much police force can we possibly deploy to protect millions of women from even bigger number or sex offenders?
Is constant strangulation of womenhood is our culture?