post the best jokes here

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cyber

my name defines me
a few jokes by me,
:p during his grandmother's 80th birthday party,young mike greeted his gradmother with a kiss."happy birthday"grandma!
"thank u" she said "how old were u last birthday"
mike frowned:"i was seven but i hope it wasn't my last".


:pTwo hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says, "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says, "OK, now what?



:pA woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen. Ugh!" The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!" The man says: "You go right up there and tell him off – go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."







:pWhen NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to 300C. The Russians used a pencil.
 

chicha

High without substance...
a few jokes by me,
:p during his grandmother's 80th birthday party,young mike greeted his gradmother with a kiss."happy birthday"grandma!
"thank u" she said "how old were u last birthday"
mike frowned:"i was seven but i hope it wasn't my last".


:pTwo hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says, "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says, "OK, now what?



:pA woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen. Ugh!" The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!" The man says: "You go right up there and tell him off – go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."
:pWhen NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to 300C. The Russians used a pencil.[/quote]
this one is not a joke it really happened.
any ways the rest are not "best"

a man with a suit and tie gets on to a bus with 6 little children, a lady looks at him and says you have good looking children, the man says i am a salesman with a condom company and these are complaints.
 
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