What to do?

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whyme

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See I am almost 28 and having one big insecure job which gives me no happiness. I dont have any qualification to look for any other job too.

Years back I was in an engg collg doing comp.science. I was known for being a tech geek and was in the quiz team , IT club etc, but for a brief stint.(was The only one who bought CHIP each month ;which later changed its name to DIGIT)

Soon I was into major depression, due to some personal reasons and
though I sat there for 4 years couldnt earn the degree. I had failed in most subjects but dont even know which were they.My mind was completely blank and wild.

Shockingly There wasn't a supporting hand either from the
so called "friends" or the staff which made things more worse.They werent aware that I was taking medicines for depression but surely knew things
werent going well with me. They all chose to stay away from me..(still something which shocks me)

Now recently I looked at some of my old textbooks, submitted assignments etc.Saw some of the inital ones with A+ and good marks . The rest all were nightmare. I love the subject. At the bottom of my heart I
wish to devour those but my age and circumstances wont allow me to study something I love. Those who had no idea on what they were studying, and who chose to copy for exams are today enjoying onsite visits in MNC's. Dont think I'm jealous; but very much happy for them. But see how life played it
with me.

Today I am feeling so sad with my very boring and unimaginable life. The number of friends I have is Zero. No one calls in my phone except for the service providers with their ads.The situaton is far far worse than what you can comprehend, but I need to write it somewhere else I'll turn mad.
 

DigitalDude

PhotonAttack
my situation is also almost the same :( except that I have completed my degree (with gr8 difficulty in the end), missed 3 good job offers, and bedridden at present. :(

don't lose hope at any cause. we can get back everything that has been lost.

and btw what you say about 'friends' is shockingly true... :( we can know who are our real friends only when we are in deep trouble.


_
 
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whyme

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@whyme: where are you from?.. better, where are you now?

Sorry. dont wish to give enough details..

But thanks for consideration. (I havent seen much in the past.)

I know this would be a stupid question making no sense. But is there any way to get out of this pit?
 
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R2K

In the Zone
dude don't get discouraged...everything will be just fine....
I was also a below average student but I am not concerned about it at all... u know why ? because at the end of the day it is ur skills and talents that matters... not those god damn degrees and stuff... analyze and find ur interests and try to mature it.... believe me friend u will move up in life....and remember there is no such thing as age limit for studies
I have seen 60 year old man attending a diploma course in autocad with us in U.A.E..
 
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whyme

Guest
dude don't get discouraged...everything will be just fine....
I was also a below average student but I am not concerned about it at all... u know why ? because at the end of the day it is ur skills and talents that matters... not those god damn degrees and stuff... analyze and find ur interests and try to mature it....

I wasnt below average but someone my family had high expectations on. That
turns a big problem. Moreover only my parents n siblings kno my details..
So for the rest ,they look at me as someone wasting my life. My younger and elder cousin bros and sisters always busy with their high paid jobs, buying new gadgets and stuff, having fun..etc etc.. and as you can understand I cant go upto them and explain why I have cocooned myself to this situation, not opting for a good job and all.

As you mentioned on interests, it has slipped out of my hands but I am trying my best to be practical. But it is really tough when no one is around to help or understand you.

And dont take me as a crybaby. There are no more tears. And I'm working almost like 24*7. But the blow and circumstances are bad enough. I'm literally chained in this pit
 

Faun

Wahahaha~!
Staff member
First thing, getting job isn't difficult. But getting the job you love is difficult.

So either start with something simple or indulge in the rat race.

My advice will be to stop using any pills, if there are some sedatives then reduce the frequency gradually till you stop it completely.

Talk with your parents or if you have any pet then play with it. Listen to some soothing music. Remember life can be as simple as you make it.

Its not the events happening in life but how you perceive them is important. So a positive attitude with no b!tching is always good. Help some poor soul, you will feel better. Imagine how many more are in much worse condition than you.

Lastly don't try to pretend or fake anything. Truth can be hard to keep on but its better than a thousand lies which you spoke to disguise other lies.
 
Wow, looking at you, I feel rather odd. I am heading towards the same path you are heading to right now.

For the past month, I have been falling ill frequently, I feel increasingly depressed and my mind feels blurry.

But one difference is that my friends are *still* behind me. They see that I am still the old guy that I was and I still have the same old brains because I notice that I often end up helping people better understand subjects despite me being in the bottom of the class in some of them.

I still have my rock solid logic, but I am getting sick and tired of this fact based world. I am sick of studying subjects that need us to memorise a HUGE list of stuff and apply them robotically to solve problems.

I like to have fewer rules curtailing my thoughts and more space to express them and create something new. So I started getting hooked on to computers and programming.

But of late, I am inching more towards writing as a profession (despite my rather bad spelling, I DO produce decent stuff especially under pressure).

My dad is pissed off at me because I am a science student (I am in 12th and aged 17) studying CBSE's PCMC syllabus. He says I should have taken up arts if I wanted to write. But I like doing things for doing's sake, and I took up science only because I love learning about new things and getting to know how things work - it inspires me in life.

Currently, I have a solid future if you put me (even at this moment) into a good computer engineering collage. But at other subjects I am performing poorly (especially in Physics and Chemistry, once upon a time feilds of my insanely high expertise in comparison with my peer group). I have a HUGE backlog of stuff to study, which I think I can make up for, but I doubt I would be able to study my last year's portions thoroughly enough to make it in IIT-JEE. And yeah, I go to coaching for the same where I am doing miserably, and there is a HUGE weight of expectations from my family on me.

My dad says he wouldn't send me to any place to study by paying a huge sum in donation or fees, and he wants me to make it by rank or by merit, or atleast, prove myself competitively superior to others if I want to go someplace of my choice.

I don't know what to do at this point. The max I can do at the moment, even if I work really hard, is manage a good score in 12th, and from there, there are dead ends wherever I see.

WHAT DO I DO ? :cry:
 
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