Interview at Infosys [Joke ]

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Interviewer: Tell me about yourself.

Candidate: I am Kondesh Kulkarni. I did my Tele Communication engineering from BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology.

Interviewer: BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology? I had never heard of this college before!

Candidate: Great! Even I had not heard of it before getting an admission into it. What happened is - due to cricket world cup I scored badly in 12th. I was getting a paid seat in a good college. But my father said (I prefer to call him 'baap') - "I cannot invest so much of money". (The baap actually said - "I will never waste so much of money on you"). So I had to join this college. Frankly speaking this name - BabanRao Dhole-Patil, can at the most be related to a Shetakari Mahavidyalaya.

Interviewer: ok, ok. It seems you have taken 6 years to complete your engineering.

Candidate : Actually I tried my best to finish it in 4 years. But you know , these cricket matches and football world cup, and tennis tournaments..It is difficult to concentrate. So I flunked in 2nd and 3rd year. So in all I took 4 + 2 = 7 years.

Interviewer: But 4+2 is 6.

Candidate: Oh, is it? You know I always had KT in maths. But I will try to keep this in mind. 4+2 is 6, good, thanks. These cricket matches really affect exams a lot. I think they should ban it.

Interviewer : Good to know that you want cricket matches to be banned.

Candidate: No, no.. I am talking about Exams!!

Interviewer: Ok, What is your biggest achievement in life?

Candidate: Obviously, completing my Engineering. My mom never thought I would complete it. In fact, when I flunked in 3rd year, she was looking for a job for me in BEST (Bus corporation in Maharashtra) through some relative ..

Interviewer: Do you have any plans of higher study?

Candidate: He he he.. Are you kidding? Completing 'lower' education itself was so much of pain!!:D

Interviewer: Let's talk about technical stuff. On which platforms have you worked?

Candidate: Well, I work at SEEPZ, so you can say Andheri is my current platform. Earlier I was at Vashi center. So Vashi was my platform then. As you can see I have experience of different platforms! (Vashi and Andheri are the places in Mumbai)

Interviewer: And which languages have you used?

Candidate: Marathi, Hindi, English. By the way, I can keep quiet in German, French, Russian and many other languages.:D

Interviewer: Why VC is better than VB?

Candidate: It is a common sense - C comes after B. So VC is a higher version than VB. I heard very soon they are coming up with a new language VD!:D

Interviewer : Do you know anything about Assembly Language?

Candidate : Well, I have not heard of it. But I guess, this is the language our ministers and MPs use in assembly.

Interviewer: What is your general project experience?

Candidate: My general experience about projects is - most of the times they are in pipeline!

Interviewer: Can you tell me about your current job?

Candidate: Sure, Currently I am working for Bata InfoTech ltd. Since joining BIL, I am on Bench. Before joining BIL, I used to think that Bench was another software like Windows.

Interviewer: Do you have any project management experience?

Candidate: No, but I guess it shouldn't be difficult. I know Word and Excel. I can talk a lot. I know how to dial for International phone call and use speaker facility. And very important - I know few words like - 'Showstoppers', 'hotfixes', 'SEI-CMM', 'quality', 'versioncontrol', 'deadlines', 'Customer Satisfaction' etc. Also I can blame others for my mistakes!:D

Interviewer: What are your expectations from our company?

Candidate: Not much.

1. I should at least get 40,000 in hand.

2. I would like to work on a live EJB project. But it should not have deadlines. I personally feel that pressure affects natural talent.

3. I believe in flexi-timings.

4. Dress code is against basic freedom, so I would like to wear t-shirt and jeans.

5. We must have sat-sun off. I will suggest wednesday off also, so as to avoid breakdown due to overwork.

6. I would like to go abroad 3 times a year on short term preferably 1-2 months) assignments. Personally I prefer US, Australia and Europe . But considering the fact that there is a world cup in West Indies in 2007,I don't mind going there in that period . As you can see I am modest and don't have many expectations. So can I assume my selection?

Interviewer: He he he ha ha ha. Thanks for your interest in our organization. In fact I was never entertained so much before. :)) We look forward to working with you .. welcome to Infosys :)
 

fun2sh

Pawned!... Beyond GODLIKE
my gaaaaaaaaaaaawd if its true THEN MAIN BE PADH KAR KYA KARUNGA. ISE TO AISE HI NAUKARI MIL GAYI AUR MAIN YAHAN ENGG ME ROJ APAN DIMAG KHAPATA HUN. :mrgreen:
 

BBThumbHealer

BlackBerry Guru ! :)
overall gud but this seemed strange ...

DigitalImmigrant said:
Interviewer: He he he ha ha ha. Thanks for your interest in our organization. In fact I was never entertained so much before. :)) We look forward to working with you .. welcome to Infosys :)

how can they do this ?? :confused: :eek: :razz:

fun2sh said:
my gaaaaaaaaaaaawd if its true THEN MAIN BE PADH KAR KYA KARUNGA. ISE TO AISE HI NAUKARI MIL GAYI AUR MAIN YAHAN ENGG ME ROJ APAN DIMAG KHAPATA HUN. :mrgreen:

then y don't u go ahead ? :D .... make this man ur idol ! :))
 
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Quiz_Master

* Teh Flirt King *
It can't be real.
But ofcourse its hilarious.

"Interviewer : Good to know that you want cricket matches to be banned.

Candidate: No, no.. I am talking about Exams!!"

And this one

"Interviewer: Why VC is better than VB?

Candidate: It is a common sense - C comes after B. So VC is a higher version than VB. I heard very soon they are coming up with a new language VD!"
_____________
Actuallly every sinhle bit was hilarious. Amazing. U made my day.
 

Lucky_star

Still Shining!
ROFL :D:D:D

medigit said:
is this real....
Infosys has more than 70,000 people working worldwide. If they take people like this, then soon it will be the global leader in IT.:p

If Infy ever asked questions like this, then no student would ever think of anythng else.:-o
 

Apollo

"Technologic"
Staff member
BlackBerry7100g said:
how can they do this ?? :confused: :eek: :razz:
Last year, an undergrad-engineer friend of mine was picked up by TCS via campus recruitments. He had listed studying the share market as one of his hobbies under his resume, and the only question he was asked in the PI was to state the previous day's share price of TCS. He got the job.
 

iMav

The Devil's Advocate
BlackBerry7100g said:
how can they do this ??
if this was campus recruitment i am not surprised that the guy was hired coz as it is first 2 years they make u do nothing and ur just having fun and some time spent on training other than that its all time pass no work at infy and tcs :)
 

Lucky_star

Still Shining!
iMav said:
if this was campus recruitment i am not surprised that the guy was hired coz as it is first 2 years they make u do nothing and ur just having fun and some time spent on training other than that its all time pass no work at infy and tcs :)
Who said you that?
 

iMav

The Devil's Advocate
every 1 of my friends who have been employed there last year and the yr before that

and all my cousin's friend who got recruited there last year and before that ;)
 

Lucky_star

Still Shining!
^^^Is it? Yippppeeee
Actually I got selected in Tcs this year, and as far as I know, the job is somwhat difficult for the first 2 years, as they make freshers to do heavy job.
iMav, thanks for the info you gave:rolleyes:
 

iMav

The Devil's Advocate
man my aggregate wasnt sufficient so wasnt eligible but from what every 1has told me that the first 2 years of training are fun but if theres some project that springs up they might turn towards u but infy toh im sure its fun tcs only 2 guys have given me feedback ... infy bahut log hain
 

praka123

left this forum longback
Isnt this the reason one man some "subramanya" got ditched off from Infy.i remember reading "skit" made by this infosys employee criticizing how infy newbies waiting for job there as "benchies" :D
 

aryayush

Aspiring Novelist
Why are so many people wondering whether this is real or not! Do you need someone to confirm it to you that it is just a (very poor) joke! :lol:
 
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