Poor Jokes Thread

[rezurect007]

PJ's anyone:

Collection of some of the most pathetic poor jokes

Q.What's a PJ ?
Answer: Obviously "a poor joke"
Question: What's a (P + i J)?
Answer: "complex poor joke"
But why don't people laugh on a "complex poor joke" ?

A. Because the joke part of it is imaginary.

Q.What did one elephant comment when a she-elephant passed by a group of elephants?

A.3600-2400-3600

Q. You are in a boat in the middle of a river. You have 2 cigarettes and have to light any one cigarette.
You don't have anything else with you in the boat?
How will you do it?

A.Take one cigarette and throw it in the water. So the boat will become LIGHTER........using this LIGHTER you can light the other cigarette.
Another deadly answer:
Another solution: You throw a cigarette up and catch it. Catches win Matches. Using the matches that you win, you can light the cigarette


Q. A railway station beggar meets another beggar. A software engineer meets another software engineer.
Both of them ask the same question to each other.
What is the question?

A."So, which platform are you working on?"

Q: What happened to the fireproof, unbreakable, shockproof, waterproof watch?
A: I lost it.

What is height of Suicide?
A dwarf jumping from the footpath on the road.

What is height of De-hydration?
A cow giving milk powder.

 

[Alok]

Knock, knock....

 

[rezurect007]

Knock, knock....

Whose there?

 

[patrick4]

^^ whos there?

 

[Shah]

Q: Why the kela(banana) is very sad?
A: Because it is a-kela(alone)

 

[rajeevk]

Another PJ:
Q: What is height of Fashion?
A: Dhoti with a zip.

 

[Siddhartha_t69]

A lady teacher in a primary school:
teacher: Kids, What does a chicken give you?
derp: Eggs
teacher: Good children. What does a fat pig give you?
derp:Becon
teacher: Very Good derp, What doea a fat cow give you?
derp: Homeworks.

 

[axes2t2]

What did the cat say when the girl slipped ?

Meow-Meow....aur kya bolegi

 

[utkarsh73]

Teacher was explaining a diagram in the class and all the students were looking in the text-book. To catch their attention, she drew the diagram on the board and said "Don't look at book figure, look at my figure"......

 

[tkin]

Thread getting better and better.

 

[Rahim]

^Yes indeed!! These jokes are not PJs....simple but funny ones

QA Girl asks while showing her index finger, if this is Pankaj then what is this (bending her index finger)?
A Pankaj Udhas.

 

[rezurect007]

Q.I'm not a fan of Computer-related jokes.
Not one bit.


QAfter a long night of making love, the young guy rolled over, pulled out a cigarette from his jeans and searched for his lighter.

Unable to find it, he asked the girl if she had one at hand.

"There might be some matches in the top drawer," she replied.

He opened the drawer of the bedside table and found a box of matches sitting neatly on top of a framed picture of another man.

Naturally, the guy began to worry.

"Is this your husband?" he inquired nervously.

"No, silly," she replied, snuggling up to him.

"Your boyfriend then?" he asked.

"No, not at all," she said, nibbling away at his ear.

"Well, who is he then?" demanded the bewildered guy.

Calmly, the girl replied, "That's me before the operation."



Q.I walked up to a tramp today and said, "If you answer this question correctly, you will be in with a chance of winning one million pounds. Would you like to try?"

Her eyes lit up, "Yes please!"

I said, "Right then. What is 50p + 50p?"

He screamed, "One Pound!"

So I give her one pound and told her to go buy a lottery ticket.


Q.My calculator is missing the minus button, but on the plus side it still works.




Q.Teacher: Right class I want you all to think of a sentence that uses the word 'contagious'. Sarah you have a go.

Sarah: My sister has a cold and I think it's contagious.

Teacher: Good. Now Kate.

Kate: My cousin's laugh is really contagious.

Teacher: Excellent. Billy your turn.

Billy: My Dad was painting the fence on Saturday, and it took the c*nt ages.




Q.A tortoise went into a police station and said, "Help, I've just been mugged by 3 snails".
The policeman said, "Can you describe them?"
The tortoise said, "No, it all happened so fast!"

 

[Skud]

Bahawah...

 

[rezurect007]

I had 2 FLIES crawl under my keyboard before, I've managed to get one under CTRL but the other managed to ESC.


Call me prejudiced if you like, but if I owned a shop I'd ban all people with blurry faces from coming in.

 

[theserpent]

Raj:long time no talk(to sham)
sham:Hmm...

 

[cute.bandar]

Q . why is that girl always smilling.
A. because she lives in flat no 32-C (bateesC)

 

[axes2t2]

What do call an alligator in a vest ?

An Investigator.

 

[Niilesh]

^
This made remember a similar joke

Q.What is automatically?
A. auto-me-takli

 

[ajai5777]

There is a classic comedy scene in a famous malayalam movie.Dont know whether it will be good if it is translated to english, still let me try.
Hero is recently married and he is trying hard to impress his wife.He learns some jokes from magazines and goes near wife who is washing clothes.
Hero : I just remembered a joke and wanted to tell you.
Wife : yeah..tell.
Hero : A man goes to a barber shop and asks what items are there? salesman says cutting and shaving. Then the man : 1 plate cutting and 1 plate shaving
Hero is laughing his ass off after telling this joke
I guess you can imagine the expression in the wife's face

 

[nims11]

once a plane was tranferring mad people from one hospital to another. Suddenly a guy threw a fridge out of the plane. Why?

Spoiler

because he was mad

Once a couple were sitting near a lake full of crocodiles. The lake had an island at its center with a beautiful rose. The girl asked the boy to get the rose for her, who at first was not willing to take the risk, but later due to the insisting girl, went to fetch the rose. When he returned, he found the girl was dead. How?

Spoiler

the fridge fell on the girl